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Lately everything has been going suspiciously well. My university exam went more than ok, work has been relatively bearable and most of the stuff I have bought have been on sale. While other people may be tickled pink about things going their way, I, being the pessimistic piece of shit I am, grew suspicious. I was sure something bad was gonna happen to me, like I dunno, maybe I was about to accidentally cause a nuclear holocaust by not sorting my trash or some shit. I just knew something was gonna go wrong.

And something did happen.

Not a nuclear holocaust.

Something a lot worse.

I CHIPPED MY TOOTH

This would be nothing too serious except for the fact that my graduation party's this saturday, which involves a lot of smiling and talking to people. If I don't manage to get a dentist's appointment tomorrow or the day after, I know a certain someone who's gonna be a very grumpy motherfucker at his own party.

   This incident got me thinking about pessimism. As I mentioned before and as you have probably come to understand from the way I complain and bitch about everything, I'm a very pessimistic and cynical person. Sometimes it's really crippling, seeing everything as shit and every opportunity to do something as a chance to fail utterly, but in cases like these it's really helpful. I already knew something was going to happen, and being prepared for it it didn't bum me out for longer than a few hours.

Being pessimistic is really cool. You're either always right or then something is pleasantly surprising.

I hate it when people (VIII)

think that they need to alter their whole personality because of a fad.
I am of course talking about the alarmingly popular "thug in the streets, fag in the sheets"-phenomenon. To those who haven't been affected by this dangerous craze the homosexual youth has gone into I'll give you the definition.

"thug in the streets, fag in the sheets" abbr. TITFITS
definition: a homosexual male, usually 16-24 years of age, who tries to forcefully hide any feminine traits/gestures/other he might have in order to seem like a dark, brooding and "straight-acting" badass.

I first came in contact with titfits two years ago in Milan. I had been away for some time and once I saw some of my old friends I couldn't recognize them. The same boys and men who used to go out dressed in suits or well coordinated ensembles showing their personal style were now wearing worn-to-death sneakers and basketball uniforms. At first I thought it was just a thing some of my friends did, but once I entered a club I saw so many sweat stained sport shirts and creaky sneakers I thought I was in a weird german fetish flick. I was shocked, but got over it soon because I thought that it would only be a passing fad.

So I thought.

The fad sort of evolved in other directions which caught on in Finland as well (18 months late of course). It was like an epidemic, all the queens started wearing the same outfits: simple sneakers with lots of denim and a snapback. I kept hoping that it would end but it still hasn't. I guess I just have to claw my eyes out or burn down the hellhole where these people keep buying their clothes.
   But the thing is that it's not just the way people are dressing up nowadays, it's more the way they act. The aforementioned "basketball afacionados" do their best to look like a pussyloving jock and I know some people who go as far as pretending to like sports and rap or other genres of music to impress people. Homosexual people are deliberately assimilating themselves to the fantasy creature that is the mainstream dream heterosexual. Meanwhile the hand gestures are getting more subtle, the voices are getting less nasal and the struts are losing their bounce. All things considered "feminine" are thrown away as if they were wrong in some way. Why is it wrong to be feminine? Is there something wrong with women? WAT IZ HAPPENIN?

I really don't have a conclusion and I guess one isn't needed in this case. If it isn't obvious already I'm not trying to dictate people how to lead their life. I also apologize beforehand if I seem too judgmental, it was not my intention. 

If there's one thing I hate it would have to be begging for comments on a blog post, but I'd seriously love to hear your thoughts on the matter. If you have nothing to say just say if you understood this post or not, I'm really tired and dizzy and can't really concentrate on writing lol.

intermission

I'm gonna have a little break from updating mostly because of work stuff and other shit stressing me out  so feel free to follow me, eurotrasher, on instagram. It's basically all just somewhat amusing pictures of me and my life which some people may or may not find interesting.

(I seriously promise that the break will be short this time.)

wwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwvw

Really bored and overexcited about transparencies.

(try dragging mickey around)

and i find it hard to eat, sleep and dream but there's a pill for that

Nothing beats a nice two-week-flu. I absolutely love feeling 265% more miserable than usual and not being able to do anything about it. Trying to keep my mental health intact has been harder than I thought, especially when you're constantly high on cough medicine and painkillers. The only thing that kept me going was a daily chit-chat with my toes. Yes. My toes.
   I'm finally feeling somewhat ok so today I'm going to actually do something. I hope I don't spread this gospel of snot and fever around too much.

take me drunk i am home

So I was in Tampere the other weekend. I was supposed to write something about it last week but I sorta forgot. Sorry. Anygays a lot of shit went down so I'm just gonna go into detail about one particular event that was both the most exhilarating and agonizing one I've experienced in a while.

It was a painfully bright morning after a long night of heavy drinking. I was in a room with about 20 other people who, like me, all smelled like sin and warm beer. I had promised to go check out a gig of a friend of mines and after ~10 hours of watching TV and complaining about my hangover I managed to get going. None of my company came with me but I was feeling confident enough to go by myself. I got to the venue on time and had a great time.
    Then it was time for the after party, which is when things got a bit more unnerving. I knew the spot where the after party was held was somewhere in the vicinity of the venue, but had no idea how to get there. I sorta squeezed my way into this group of guys who looked like they knew where to go. And they did indeed know the way, but chose the fastest route, which happened to be through a few fucking icebergs and railway tracks. Needless to say at this point I was fearing for my life and re-evaluating my life choices.
    We still managed to get to the spot (which was this really cool abandoned factory with good acoustics) but once we got there my heart was still racing and I felt uncomfortable. After an hour or so I decided to leave. 

Alone.
Because I was feeling so fucking confident.
Biggest mistake ever.

    I walked what I considered as the right way for 30 minutes before realizing that i was walking on the motherfucking highway. Then, just as I had found the real right way, my iPhone ran out of power. I decided to trust my instincts and go right on ahead. I did this for closer to 2 hours before ending up at the exact same spot where I had started. I didn't know whether to cry or laugh so I did a little of both. Then I saw this dude (who was wearing protective eyewear for some reason lol u so avant garde) and asked him for directions. He pulls out his smartphone and starts typing. Thinking he was going to look up the right way on google maps I was thinking about telling him to stop because one of those things got me lost in the first place but then he started talking on the phone. He called a cab (which I had no money to pay for) and hung up the phone.
    We started talking and that's when I realized that he was a seriously fucked up crackhead. His method of forming phrases was by far the strangest I've ever witnessed. I only remember a few of the things he said but they went something like this:

Crackhead with goggles: "Nice weather out today it's not really nice but are you gay?"

Me: "Uh yeah it's foggy and yeah I am."

CWG: "That's cool I once had a dog."

Me: "Okay."

CWG: "[shouts really loud] EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE. I'm waiting for my friend but I don't know if he can hear me but luckily I have these goggles."

at this point I was really fearing for my life but I still got in the cab with him. He jumped off at some point without paying but the cab driver didn't bother trying to catch him because he was really scared of him too. He ended up taking me to my friends place for free. The next morning I woke up really dizzy and confused.

All in all it was a weekend full of seeing people I haven't seen in ages, drinking too much and getting acquainted with freaky people which at the end of the day is better than staying in bed all day.

Which is what I usually do on weekends.

I'm so wild.

random gif collection vol. Ⅰ

 

I like making shitty gifs. Making them makes you feel like you're doing something useful when you're actually just fucking around. Feel free to steal these if you want idc